Ran into this online and thought it was a great message to share with all my parents! The complete message is very long so I decided to break them into pieces. This week we will focus on how much time has changed over the generations. Also on our teaching! How are we teaching our kids what they need to know in all aspect of life. Are we helping them nourish spiritually according to the word, socially how society wants us too, or a combination of both? Is there one more important to you over the other ? And if so why?
*Part of teaching a child is having clear instructions on what is said and expected!
“As an older woman and now as a grandma, I often receive questions about parenting. Times sure have changed since my husband and I were raising our children, and many of the discipline methods used then are no longer recommended by the “experts” of today. Young moms and dads are looking for help and wisdom. Regardless of the newest studies and books about parenting, the Lord has given timeless counsel in 2 Timothy 3:16-17: “All Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, rebuking, correcting, training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work (NASB).”
The core of discipline is to disciple, to teach, to train, to clarify what is right and wrong through instruction. Children need these things, and they will not learn them from videos or children’s television programs. Parenting is not a passive activity; it demands consistent and personal involvement by mom and dad.
Dads have an enormous responsibility in discipling their children. Far too often I observe them leaving all of the child training up to their wives and only getting involved when mom is frazzled because the kids are out of control. Fathers are to teach their children to fear God and walk in His ways. They are to teach their children, both by modeling and by instruction, how to serve the Lord with all their heart and soul (Deut. 10:12).
Moms have the responsibility of supporting and enforcing the discipline methods that Scripture provides and that their husbands determine is the best course of action. There is little that is more destructive to family relationships than for mother to undermine the authority of the father, deciding that his instructions for discipline are arbitrary, or that her way is better. Usually, these arrangements are clandestine and the children are told, “Don’t tell dad!” There are no winners when this becomes the norm. The kids get mixed messages about discipline; the mother sets up a secret treaty with them and becomes an adversary of her husband instead of his partner in parenting.
Expectations for behavior must not only be made clear, but must also be enforced. If you are going to set a standard, you must be sure your children understand what it is. Ask clarifying questions such as, “What did I ask you?” “Do you understand what I want you to do?” When children fail to obey, it is important to discern if the failure was intentional disobedience, a lack of understanding, or simple childishness. Not all disobedience is willful; sometimes children are just being silly, squirrelly kids!”